Dead Upon the White House Lawn

He was just the son of a fat cat and happily took his birth right

He checked off his stocks and made sure his toupee was tight;

He had to sit and listen to those awful ecologists talk,

“You aint gunna trump no more!”

 

(CHORUS)

Gory, Gory, gunna kick his orange arse

String him by the flag pole

And make him eat his pants

You aint gunna Trump no more

 

Verse 2

“Is everybody happy?” cried his daddy looking up,

Our Don feebly answered “Yes”, and then they stood him up;

He jumped into his fancy suit and exposed his greedy eyes,

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

(CHORUS)

 

Verse 3

He counted long, he counted loud, he waited for his stocks,

He felt the pinch, he felt the debt, he saw the FTSE drop,

He pissed his silk pyjamas and it dripped around his legs,

And he aint gunna Trump no more

 

(CHORUS)

 

 

Verse 4

The debtors swung around his neck, creditors cracked his dome,

Muscle fibres were tied in knots around his fatty bones;

The networks become his shroud; he hurtled to the ground.

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

 

(CHORUS)

 

Verse 5

The days he’d corrupted and exploited and manipulated kept running through his mind,

He thought about the boy back home, the one he’d left behind;

He thought about the auditors and wondered what they’d find,

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

(CHORUS)

 

Verse 6

The bankruptcies were on the spot, the administrators were running wild,

The journalists jumped and screamed with glee, sharpened their pens and smiled,

For it had been a year or more since the last ‘ruptcy had been filed,

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

Verse 7

Full of braggadocio the bankruptcies went flying by,

He covered his ass, he bent the rules, walloping a great smile;

But his hair fell out, his stomach dropped down

And he aint gunna Trump no more

 

(CHORUS)

 

2016 he decided to run, Republican till he dropped, his popularity went soaring high

His minions they were heard to say: “What a way to go!”

He got to the top on the back of his own lies,

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

(CHORUS)

 

With small hands that like to be sodden in wee, he boasted about his dick

He said build a wall, the racists stood tall and put on their pointy hats

He stoked the fires, laid lies left and right; but the wall stands tall!

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

People said no way, there’s not a chance in hell

He is not gunna win, that much I can tell

How do you feel, now he stands proud?

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

(CHORUS)

 

There was blood upon the white house, there were brains upon the lawn

Intestines were a-danglin’ from his thousand dollar suit

He was a mess; they picked him up, and poured him from his shoes,

And he aint gunna Trump no more.

 

Gory, Gory, What a hell of way to die

Gory, Gory, What a hell of way to die

Gory, Gory, What a hell of way to die

He ain’t gonna Trump no more.

 

(Slowly, solemnly)

The assassin sat amongst the trees, rifle at his back

He couldn’t quite believe, he’d shot the president through the leaves

The shot was heard the sirens wailed, but there he stayed a-smiling

Cyanide dissolved upon his tongue, and there he died, reclining

 

(CHORUS)
The killer was found and his name was screamed loud

CUUUUUUULLLLLLLKIIIIINNNNNN

As Macaulay hit the dust , he had claimed back his fame at last

And he aint gunna Trump no more

 

Gory, Gory, gunna kick his orange arse

String him by the flag pole

And make him eat his pants

You aint gunna Trump no more